


Mission reports in 17 easy syllables

by bironic



Category: House M.D., Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Gen, Haiku, Humor, Mission Reports, Patient of the Week, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-24
Updated: 2007-12-24
Packaged: 2017-10-06 09:29:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bironic/pseuds/bironic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bite got infected.<br/>Briefly turned into a bug.<br/>(I really hate bugs.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mission reports in 17 easy syllables

**Author's Note:**

> So [Pru](http://archiveofourown.org/users/rageprufrock/pseuds/rageprufrock) was talking about how Sheppard must write totally unhelpful mission reports such as "We went to the village. There was a pony," and her examples got me thinking about him writing them up as haiku just to be difficult.
> 
> Then I started adding patient-of-the-week summaries for House.
> 
> More haiku by friends are in [comments here](http://bironic.livejournal.com/107202.html).

**SGA**

Bite got infected.  
Briefly turned into a bug.  
(I really hate bugs.)

.

Wraith made us see ghosts.  
I shot Ronon and McKay.  
Typical mission.

.

Through the misty gate  
We found ourselves on not-Earth.  
Zombies were the key.

.

It was five-sixths of  
a solar system; when will  
you get over it?

.

Ignored McKay's ad-  
vice. Six months meditating  
was my punishment.

.

Jumper brought down; team  
taken hostage; bondage for  
everyone. Hooray!

.

Oh, Pegasus. I'll  
always remember that time  
with the tentacles.  
   
   
   
**House**

Rabies case revealed  
That Wilson has two brothers.  
Nice: a mystery.

.

"Daddy's Boy" is on.  
House and Wilson are flirting  
like mad while Chase smiles.

Wilson will find out  
what House does with his cane when  
he buys him dinner.

Too bad about the  
patient; all that Ivy League  
schooling gone to waste.

It was funny when  
the law firm guy thought Cameron  
was a hooker, though.


End file.
